Making the Hope Real

It has only happened once and for that I am grateful.

The waitress was so nice and so pleasant and asked my wife about her pregnancy and the baby and all the usuals when people meet a very pregnant woman with a bulging belly-button. She was as nice as she could be.

But when she brought the check she asked us if the checks should be separate or together.

"Well, I'm pretty sure my wife thinks of my money as her money and her money as my money - so one check will be fine."

Would a couple of the same race be asked the same question?

I don't know, but I have my suspicions.

I'm not hating on the waitress - just a casual observation. But, we had more than one friend in Florida speculate on how well a bi-racial couple was going to be welcomed to conservative Ohio. Secretly, I suspected they might be right. I have to say that I was surprised that Ohio went for Pres-Elect Obama. Happy but surprised, and that seems to be a testament to both the people of Ohio and Mr. Obama.

Since moving back here full-time in September, I have observed more mixed-race couples than I expected, and our neighborhood in west Akron is racially mixed and seemingly very harmonious.

On the other hand, a golfing-buddy of mine expressed that he was worried about our kids and what they would have to go through as bi-racial children. I read between the lines pretty well. He wasn't worried about my kids. Golf-buddy was letting me know passive-aggressively that he didn't approve. He said this after seeing a picture of my wife and asking me what "nationality" she is.

Yesterday in line at Giant Eagle a young mother in front of me wanted to pay for her groceries using a combination of cash and debit card. For some reason the cashier couldn't figure out how to do this and the supervisor who came to help also had difficulty. They figured out the problem eventually - they had been trying to process the sale assuming the young, black mother was using a food stamp card rather than a regular bank debit card. She had told them. I heard her tell them. But they made an assumption.

This is a time of hope and change. Even though we hear the doom and gloom of the economy on one hand there is a sense of optimism on the other. And we seem to be looking past race while doing it - because we all want the best for our country - which means we want the best for ourselves.

Let's see if we can hold on to that hope - make it real. Empower everybody with no excuses with no stereotypes.